I woke up the next morning and insisted that my bags be placed in the car. Joe just figured it was just typical manic me. He dawdled, so I did it myself. I don't like dawdling. The boys were both sick so we took them to grandmas for the day. I held back tears as I kissed them goodbye, knowing that I wouldn't see them at home that night. I also held back tears because I yelled at Daniel just as we left the house. He was upset because I didn't let him carry my suitcase and he cried, so I yelled... Instantly I felt horrible. He just wanted to help his mommy and I was taking it out on him because his daddy didn't do it.
I go to my doctors and get my exam. At this point I'm having contractions, which I assumed were Braxton-Hicks. As we were in the waiting room, I asked Joe if it seemed like my ow-ow-ow's were coming about every eight minutes. He said indeed they are, so I began timing them. I tell the doctor that I feel that the baby has dropped because I can hardly walk with all the pressure. He told me that he didn't see any signs of Dash dropping and that I hadn't dilated at all. He said, though, that he didn't want me to wait until the last minute if anything changed over the weekend, saying he had nothing better to do anyway :). Being as I hadn't (according to him) dropped or dilated, I didn't see the need to tell him that I had been having "braxton hicks" all morning running at five minutes apart. (Thank you trusty i-phone)
Truth is, although this is my third child, I wouldn't have known a contraction if it came along and slapped me in the face. I was induced with Matthew, so I did experience labor, but labor under a pitocin drip is much more intense than what I was experiencing on this day. I was terrified of going into labor and delivering this child at home. I was more terrified of looking foolish.
But I digress. Joe and I head over to the hospital to pre-register and to get lab work done. I feel silly for thinking that I had dropped. I feel silly for not being able to shake the false contractions. So when Joe tells me that I should go ahead and eat something since I'm having labwork, I do. He brings me a tuna sandwich... Yeah, tuna. An hour into waiting for my appointment, I'm still timing contractions. Joe just grins. When I go back to have my labwork done, I mention that I think I may be having false labor. She notices that we live in Conroe, so she suggests that I may want to run up to L&D just to be safe. No sense in driving all the way home, she says. She calls Dr. Schettler, whom I had just left a few hours before and he recommends that I go also. At this point, the contractions stop. I'm sweating on the inside and clutching my stomach every five minutes anyway. I've decided to keep up the charade. The damage is now done, and again... I don't want to look foolish. :) All the time, I;m answering questions, I keep cutting my eyes at Joe, mouthing my apologies. He has so much work scheduled for the afternoon and now I'm worried that I've blown his whole day, all on a whim. He just smiles.
We go up to L&D and we see Dr. Schettler at the desk. He just grins (men) and says well at least you haven't eaten anything.... I glare at Joe and explain to the good doctor that Joe made me eat. He just shakes his head.... and smiles. The next thing I know, I'm in the lovely backless gown provided by the hospital being strapped up to the monitor. The nurse interviews me for 20 minutes or so, as I lay there looking foolish. I assume that this whole time she's watching the steady flat line of my uterus, getting ready to send me home. She then flips a switch.... looks stunned... and says "are you having any pain right now?" I tell her that I'm feeling some pain, but nothing serious. She then informs me that I have been contracting the entire time and that they are 2 minutes apart! She is stunned that I can actually hold a conversation. I burst out laughing and grinning (my turn now). I feel utterly elated and vindicated and I tell Joe that "Men... They don't know nothing about birthing no babies!" I'm gloating... I KNEW it! I was RIGHT! hahahaha. I told you I was having contractions! And so it went. I laugh maniacally until I realize that within hours our new son will be here! There are things that didn't get done! The boys aren't prepared!
By this point, my blood pressure is spiking and the word is I have borderline preecclampsia. They prepare me and walk me back to the OR. They sit me down and curl me forward as they insert the spinal line into my spine. The room is freezing cold and sterile. Suddenly, I'm nervous. So many things run through your head, most of which involve my babies already at home. I miss them and need them here with me. I worry... They lay you down on the table with your arms out to the side in the shape of a crucifix. The spinal begins to work and it feels as if I can't breathe. I think the dose is a bit too high and he gives me oxygen and tells me to squeeze his fingers. My pulse rate is erratic, so they give me another med to combat that. Joe is at my head. I feel the tugging and pulling and then I hear his cries. They are angry, lusty beautiful wails and they continue... until they carry him to me. I speak to him and tell him thats it's lovely to finally meet him. Instant silence as he hears the voice that has been with him for months. I cried.
We are apart for hours as I lay shivering from the spinal wearing off. The cold you feel is indescribable. Joe is with Dash at first as they assess him and clean him, then he is with me again. there is more to the story of Dash, but I'm going to stop here for now. I want some time to process the rest.
Jacob Dashiell Asaro
September 10th 2010
7 pounds 9 ounces - 20 inches long