Thursday, July 29, 2010

How DO I Raise a Post-Racial Child in this Pro-Racial World?

Matthew and I were watching President Obama's speech this morning on The View. Matthew asked me why the President was on The View.  I told him that's a very good question.... He then asked "Isn't he too busy protecting us to be on this show?" Smart boy. It was a question I had asked myself just the night before. Surely, there is something that needs his attention right now. But the truth is, Matthew and I learned a lot about each other as we watched.... For every thing there is a season.

   This discussion led to a much more important discussion on race. Matt was reminding me how we had talked about Rosa Parks last year. He told me that it was so awful that people of color were forced to the back of the bus and told not to eat at the same counter as white folks. I then told him that he was absolutely right. I asked him if he remembered the story of Martin Luther King? He said that he did, but he didn't understand how he changed things as he did. I explained to him that Martin Luther King gave a speech and that in this speech he talked of his hopes for America. That he dreamed that we would one day live by the creed of our founding fathers... "we hold these truths to be self evident that ALL men are created equal" I explained to him that this was not a right given by men, but by God and that no man had the right to keep that away from another man. We talked about the meaning of "the content of their character". What does that mean to an eight year old? I asked Matthew what it meant to be a good human being. Matthew, in his eight year old way, told me that it means being nice and playing fairly, not lying and stealing, helping each other. We can all learn a lot from our children.

I catch myself saying... "We are past this. Why is my child noticing the color of his playmates skin suddenly?" I didn't raise him to see that way. It has become a topic of discussion in our house this year, this "post-racial" year. Why? Matthew is a smart child and he knows that mommy believes in smaller government. He knows that mommy believes that our freedom and liberty is being called into question. He hears on the television that this means mommy is a racist. Yet we have honest discussions about Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks and Frederick Douglass and what they accomplished to make America a better place for all races. We not only talk about it, we live by it.  To be called a racist because I believe in EVERY man's ability to succeed without the government nanny, is ludicrous, to say the least. After all, it isn't just people of color who are suffering right now, many are. I simply believe that the burden of responsibility lies upon us, the individual, to help our neighbor. Passing it all on to the government isn't the solution. Teaching our children to help one another cannot be taught by paying ever increasing taxes, but by action. This nation was built on individuality and the the belief that man has exclusive rights to "self" deemed by our Creator. Let NO man put asunder. Politicians are playing a very dangerous game. They do so at the expense of every man, woman and CHILD, in America. We cannot stand for it. This game of race baiting and racial division is only a means to an end.

 Eric Holder says that "we are a nation of cowards" when it comes to discussions of race. HE is the coward. He is the one who can't see racism as a two-way street. My favorite passage from the "I have a Dream" speech" is this-
"In a sense we have come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."
This tells me that Martin Luther King believed in what our forefather's promised. That he respected this experiment that we call America. This tells me that he wanted equality and FREEDOM for ALL mankind. Black, white, red, brown. Martin Luther King marched in peace. He saw the Writing on the Wall. He knew that he might die for his beliefs. HE was not a coward. And neither am I. 

I realize now that the conversation remains an important one. Although I don't want my children to notice color, I also have a responsibility to keep our history alive. The good and the bad of it all. Instead of hiding from the issue, I will discuss how we have grown from it as a nation. We are a better nation because of our struggles and our differences, not in spite of them. For those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.

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Wednesday, July 28, 2010


 ‎"mommy! mommy! there's a bulldozer dog outside!" #Danielism

"mommmmmmmyy! Matthew's tattle-telling on me!" #Danielism

Monday, July 26, 2010

You want the moon Mary...I'll throw a Lasso around it for you.

I feel like George Bailey today. The anguished George Bailey right before he realizes how blessed he is. Now if I can only find Zuzu's petals... and Clarence.
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Sunday, July 11, 2010

Amazing Sandwich

I made this sandwich for hubbies lunch today. It is amazing, especially on subway's wheat bread topped with provolone cheese. He thinks I'm very sexy. :) Thank you pioneer woman. I love you.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Reason # 10,003

Daddy is making the kids laugh in the next room. That deep belly laugh that makes their sides hurt and makes it hard to breathe. It is the best sound in the World. Reason # 10,003 of why I love my husband.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Brotherly Love

My boys come up to me in their pajamas every night and plant a big kiss on my baby bump, without any prompting from us. This small gesture of love from the two boys that constantly fight one another lets me know that all is right with the World. It gives me hope that, not only will they love this new son and brother with all they have, but will also help them find love and understanding for one another.

Matthew, most of all, is being amazing about Jacob. He loves touching my tummy and feeling him move. He loves to hear stories about how he moved just like Jacob, especially when I did yoga. How I would place my tummy close to his dads back as we slept, just so he could feel him as I did. He brings me healthy snacks and pillows and leans his head down to talk to Jacob, brother to brother. I am shocked by this amazing turn of events. I am grateful for this beautiful gift of an adoring big brother. I cried when I first told Matthew that we were having another new baby. He was the one that I dreaded telling the most. My firstborn son never took to being a big brother easily, enjoying being in our spotlight as he had until that point. He got into trouble on many occasion... for sneaking into newborn Daniels room and waking him, just to see him stretch. He loves Daniel but there was always an intense rivalry for our affections, so I was anxious to say the least.

Daniel is excited too, but for very different reasons. He is quite ready to pass on the title of "little brother" to the next victim...err, baby. This is further proof that he is getting bigger and that is his only wish. He likes to run into the living room and tell his dad and brother that "mommy has the baby in the bedroom!" He thinks its so funny to "trick" them into thinking that Jacob just showed up, as if by stork. He likes to lay his head on my tummy and feel the baby kick him. Already he's picking fights. :) He is hesitant though, because he already feels the sting of a loss of attention. He gets upset that I can't pick him up from the shopping cart, or boost him to the top of the tree-house. Babies and toddlers scare him. They pinch him and toddle after him. They grab his toys and eat his food. They smell funny and cry and get held a lot. Thats okay though because I know my Daniel and he is up for the challenge.

As for me, I am looking forward to this new dynamic. How is it that three kids can have polar opposite personalities? Will Dash be more like his big brother M as he seems to be already? Will he surprise me and mimic Daniel? I know he will be his own little man and I am excited to get to know him. He is one lucky little brother.
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